One of my friends from Dayton takes the month of July off every year. He doesn't take a vacation, leave work, or just relax with his buddies. He takes a month off from talking. He does this to better his work, focusing on what he cares most about - his art.
I have written in my journal about this before, perhaps even jokingly talked about it with a few of my close friends. However, with the occurrences of the last week, I feel led, more than ever, to take this action in my life. Please know that this is not a plead to win back broken relationships, it is not enforced by some sort of ultimatum, and is in no way an instance of me being pressured into anything whatsoever. I have decided to do this for my own good - because the incidents in my life over the past week have reminded me that I have fallen astray, both in my walk with Christ, with my earned trust from my friends, and in my daily life as a Christian.
Starting Wednesday, the 23rd of January, I will be on recess until March 1, 2008. This is not a recess where children are released from their school rooms to play outside - this is a resuscitate. During my time away, I will be using my free time to think, pray, journal, and read. I need to refocus my lifestyle on one which I have chosen to live, not one that I have fallen into. I need to decide what is important to me and for my life. I need to tangle with choices I've made in the past 8 months and realize the damage that I have done not only to myself, but to those around me that I deeply care for.
Over the next month, I will not be responding to facebook messages and comments. Majority of the time my phone will be turned off, as I will not be responding to text-messages and most phone calls. My personal iChat and AIM will remain signed off. I will not be consuming alcohol while on recess, playing XBOX, or idling online. I will, however, be online for work related activities. I will also be continuing my second job as a waiter and bartender.
I ask for your help over the next month. While it may be hard to pause our relationship, please understand that I need time to myself. I need to be able to internally process where my life is headed. I need to finally make the shift from being a rebellious college boy to taking on the responsibilities of my adult life. Please do not try and contact me to just say "hi" or to see how I'm doing, don't come into work to sit at my table, don't come to my house to check on me.
If you need to get in contact with me, the best way to do so will be via email ( mrandyclark@gmail.com ) or by leaving a voicemail on my phone - 937.409.5421. Realize that unless it is an emergency, I will most likely not respond.
Please understand that I care so much about you. I very much look forward to returning from this a new person, one with a renewed spirit, a deeper understanding of life, and one able to take responsibility for his actions.
Yours very truly.
Andrew Clark.
Andrew Clark.
